Plastic Life …

A routine Monday morning… as I seat myself in my cubicle my phone buzzes. Beep Beep!! Beep Beep!!

“Citibank Alert: Your salary of Rs XXXXX has been credited to your savings account”

Ah phew, just when I was thinking of my dwindling monetary resources in my bank. Boy!! Some relief!! My phone buzzes again. Beep Beep!! Beep Beep!!

“Citibank Alert: Your credit card statement for the month of June has been generated. You have a current outstanding of Rs XXXXX. Please pay the dues on or before 10-JUL-07 to avoid interest charges.”

I blurt out “Naasham…ollakkede moodu!!”. When translated, literally it means “Destruction… bottom of the grinding stick!!” (Yeah sounds loco). My big 70mm smile upon receiving the first SMS changed to a grimace, which could have given me a chance to win the part for Gollum in the next LOTR movie.

I can’t disclose on how much those XXXXXs are but the latter one had Rs134 more than the former. There are only two ways out of this misery

a) My salary gets doubled.
OR
b) I start spending less.

The first option is far too unfeasible and second one… haha that’s another far cry. When I flick open my wallet, I get a sense of false pride when I look at all those little golden cards studded onto it like the medals on the chest of a five starred Army General. Ah those little devils… every time I get a statement my sane self shouts out loud “Cut those wretched pieces of plastic and unceremoniously flush them down the toilet”. But I am more insane than sane in these matters.

I am a big spendthrift. I am the kinda guy who spends first then thinks later… sometimes for stuff absolutely useless to me. But if it weren’t for the plastic cash I wouldn’t ve got any of the stuff in my wishlist since college. And I am over-possessive about the stuff bought outta my money, hard earned by banging the keyboard everyday. Like there was an occasion when my roomies who had thought me to be a nutcase confirmed their fears, when I bought my bike (of course by swiping the card) and christened it Romeo. Another example, I was once riding the bus to office while listening to my iPod which I had kept on the seat next to mine. A dude got in the bus and came over to my place and sat on top of my iPod, with the songs blaring at full volume in my ears, I (in a natural tendency to hear my own voice over the loud music) shouted at the man “YOU ARE SITTING ON MY IPOD!!!”. The driver missed a heartbeat, the bus missed a gear and everyone riveted their eyes on me. The terrified dude got up and I yanked the ipod from underneath his butt. There was clear terror on his face. He wanted to get as far away as possible from this Josef Stalin with an iPod. I ve sooo got used to credit cards that I hardly hold any cash in my wallet these days. Be it petrol, clothes, food or movie tickets SWIPE! SWIPE! SWIPE!

I still remember those sweet enticing voices which made me sign up for the credit cards. One of my teammates in office asked out a "credit-card caller" just for fun. She agreed and they started dating and he ended up falling in love with her and eventually married her!! That proves that credit cards can give competition even to Mr. Cupid and run him out of business.

After a grueling day at office I stop by at Odyssey and take a walk thru the audio section, I spot a CD which catches my attention. I go through the contents and find one song which I had seen on TV and kinda liked. I flip the CD and check the price Rs. 399. I fish out my wallet and find only a torn hundred bucks note, instinctively my hands reach for the credit card and I hand it over to the cashier.